You know you are a mom if...........

Check all that apply....
[] If you not only get a shower, but style your hair, its a great day.
[] You hid a spoon or stick in your car in case of an emergency spanking
[] You let your kids watch 4 hours of cartoons on a saturday morning and eat peanut butter on a spoon
[] You've seen every rated "g" movie ever made, but don't know what is currently in the theatres
[] "Mothers morning out" to you means an exciting trip to the grocery store
[] If a man glances at you, you assume he must be looking at the spit-up stain on your shirt
[] You shove the socks, fries, juice boxes, crayons, and mcdonalds toys under the seats of the car to make it appear clean
[] Your friends or family come to visit and you offer them teddy grahams as a appetizer
[] You don't know what kind of music you like because all you listen to in the car is Disney sattelite station
[] You made pancakes for dinner because you didn't feel like hauling all your children to the grocery
[] Your children point out that your butt is bigger than your husbands
[] You wore a nursing bra under your bathing suit and actually felt like a hottie
[] You hoped that the family goldfish would die while you were all on vacation
[] A "quickie" to you is stuffing your face full of chocolate in the bathroom with the door locked
[] You hid in the pantry or laundry room so you could speak on the phone to your friends in quiet and they would think that your children were well behaved
[] Your children remind you to shave your legs
[] You drink diet coke with your whopper to lessen the calories
[] You know its time to cut your toenails when they start to snag the carpet
[] An exciting saturday night consists of trying out a new facial mask while watching "Pretty Woman"
[] You let your children wear mismatched clothes and socks to the store because you were too tired to care
[] Dr. Phil makes you cry
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